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Cybersex involves two or more individuals who engage in chat on the Internet that explicitly details sexual activity and behaviours with the purpose of becoming aroused (Wikipedia, 2005 "Cybersex"). Cybersex is used by couples who are separated by distance, or couples who have not yet met in the physical realm.
Cybersex is commonly found in the online dating sphere, and has specific chatrooms that are reserved for users to participate in cybersex. Cybersex takes place in a virtual meeting place, using either instant relay chat or emails that detail explicit sexual encounters, and can involve physical masturbation whilst communicating with a cybersex partner (Gem Bosworth, 2004).
Cybersex has been a taboo subject since the advent of instant chat, instant messaging, and email. It has been considered a distasteful activity that was an inappropriate use of the medium. More recently, cybersex is seen as more acceptable due to the increasing number of online daters and couples in long-distant relationships (Brame, 1996). Cybersex has been likened to phone sex (Gem Bosworth, 2004).
Cybersex has two main forms, which are:
1. Computer mediated interactive masturbation in real time, which involves the participants detailing to each other (via a chatroom or email) explicit sexual acts whilst also physically stimulating themselves (Gem Bosworth, 2004).
2. Computer mediated telling of interactive sexual stories with the intent of arousal, which is similar to the first form of cybersex, but does not involve masturbation. This form of cybersex allows for users to anonymously experience and share their sexual fantasies in a secure environment with other users who can respond to, and heighten, their experience (Gem Bosworth, 2004).
The benefits of cybersex include the anonymity of the Internet that allows for the less sexually-experienced or shy personalities to express themselves in a manner that allows for the exploration of sex in a secure environment (Hamman, 1996). Cybersex is another version of safe sex, which has no physical repercussions, such as pregnancy or a sexually transmitted infection (Gem Bosworth, 2004).
Cybersex also has the ability to rejuvenate a couples’ sex life with the possibility of trying something different, and often, participating in cybersex can let an individual know what their partner is stimulated by when their fantasies are explored during cybersex. Many users who have cybersex also have the belief that having cybersex does not equate to cheating on their partners.
The dangers of cybersex include the lack a user’s knowledge of the partner with whom they engage in cybersex. The Internet does not have the capacity to screen users who may be a danger to others on the Internet. Also, some users who participate in cybersex may falsify information about themselves, such as their age and sex, which can lead to questions of ethics and morals (Gem Bosworth, 2004).
Cybersex participants can sometimes take cybersex too seriously, and this may lead to cybersex addiction (Weiss, 2005). Users who participate in cybersex excessively open themselves up to becoming dependent upon the anonymity of cybersex, and this can deter them from entering a physical relationship (Gem Bosworth, 2004).
Cybersex is one of the most controversial topics of the Internet in today’s society. Virtual relationships and how they contribute to, or disable, physical relationships are also important issues that need to be addressed with regard to ethics. The most prominent ethical consideration about cybersex is the lack of knowledge a user can have about their cybersex partner/s.
With the increasing exposure of the Internet to children and youth, who are able to succinctly surf the Web in ways that some adults cannot, there is increasing concern about the youth’s exposure to adult-themed content, cybersex, and chatrooms that contain explicit material (Gem Bosworth, 2004).
While increased security has been introduced in chatrooms, it cannot be completely controlled due to the size of the Internet and its globalised characteristics. The high accesibility of the Internet means that anyone with acess to a computer and modem can enter a chatroom regardless of age, sex, race, or occupation, and can engage in cybersex.
Another ethical consideration is the increase in pedophilia on the Internet. Cybersex is partially responsible for the proliferation of this illegal activity on the Internet.
Online Dating - Stigma of Online Dating
Online Dating - Online Etiquette
Brame, G. G. (1996) "How to have Cybersex" retrieved October 11, 2005, from http://gloria-brame.com/glory/journ7.htm
Hamman, R. B. (1996) "Cybersex Amongst Multiple-Selves and Cyborgs in the Narrow-Bandwidth Space of America Online Chat Rooms" retrieved October 11, 2005, from http://www.socio.demon.co.uk/Cyborgasms_old.html
Hamman, R. B. (1996) "The Application of Ethnographic Methodology in the Study of Cybersex" retrieved October 11, 2005, from http://www.socio.demon.co.uk/magazine/1/plummer.html
Weiss, R. (2005) "How do I know if I'm a Sex Addict?" retrieved October 11, 2005, from http://www.cybersexualaddiction.com/howdoiknow.php
Wikipedia. (2005) "Cybersex" retrieved October 11, 2005, from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cybersex
Gem Bosworth 18:32, 16 Sep 2004 (EST)
Lisa Irving 11:50, 19 Oct 2005 (EST)
